The Broken Down Car Theory | Vol. 101

“The moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred… Unforeseen incidents, meetings, and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.”

 — W. H. Murray

The Broken Down Car Theory

While driving with my son, we spotted a broken-down car across the intersection that was blocking traffic. Gus asked if we should stop and help. I said we would, but that we needed to get to the parking lot across the way so we wouldn’t be blocking traffic, too.

While we waited for the light to change, the driver got out and started pushing the car forward with one arm through the window on the steering wheel. Almost instantly, four or five people hopped out and helped him push it around the corner and into a gas station. Gus simply said, “Wow.”

I knew this was one of those moments parents get gifted. I asked, “What do you think happened there?”

“That was awesome,” he replied. “Everyone just helped him out.” 

“Actually, he helped himself first. Then, everyone else pitched in.” 

Gus raised an eyebrow. I explained that if the driver had stayed in his car, people might have assumed he didn’t need help. They’d rationalize that he’d called AAA and was waiting for a tow truck. Pretty soon, someone would have started honking and people would have just driven around him. 

“We were going to help.”

“True. But I’m not sure how comfortable I would have felt tapping on his window. The moment he started pushing, everything changed.” 

So many times, it feels like everything is broken and we’re going nowhere. We’re stuck. Maybe we’re scared. Maybe we just don’t have a clue what to do. The easy choice is to do nothing, wallow in the moment, throw an impromptu pity party. Yet everything changes the moment we move into action. 

When you start moving, suddenly, people and opportunities appear. The world helps those who help themselves. That’s a law to live by. And, worst case, you’ve started making progress all by yourself.

One question to ponder in your thinking time: When do I signal I’m doing fine when I really need a helping hand?

Co-author of The One Thing & The Millionaire Real Estate Agent ​